Garage Wars

This is my house.  It's very cute, in a nice neighbourhood, and every once in a while I have to pinch my arm to remind myself that I'm not dreaming and I actually live there.

Yesterday I finally bought a car, (if you want to read about car shopping woes, you can click here).  Its a cute little Ford Focus hatchback. What occurred to me when I brought the tiny compact car home, is that it would actually fit in the garage!  My dinosaur Ford Escape most certainly does NOT fit in the garage (note garage on side of house, see how tiny it is?  The SUV technically fits... you just can't open the door to get out of the car).  So for the last 6 months I've been parked outside whilst hubby enjoys the warmth and convenience of our attached garage.  

When I mentioned to hubby that my new car would now fit in our teeny tiny garage, he said, "stay out of my garage!".  

Now I didn't think that was very fair.  Why do I have to shovel snow (which is established as hubby territory, I clean the INSIDE of the house, and he cleans the OUTSIDE.. with exception to the gardens, which we mutilate together), while he gets to zoom in and out of the garage without scraping a centimeter of ice off his window?  

Being the fair diplomatic person that I am, I suggested to hubby that we SHARE the garage.  Even though I really don't want to share.  I want it all to myself.

Hubby said NO!  Can you believe it?  He won't even SHARE!  Chivalry is dead in my house.

However, I get home from work first, so we will see.  I pick the car up on Tuesday.  We will do a test garage run and see what happens.  The only downside that I can see is that he knows how to re-program the garage remotes so technically he could "lock" me out and I would have to go inside to hit the button... but I would, because I'm spiteful like that.

I can't believe he won't share.

Fia The Destructor Part II

If you've been reading for a while, you've seen my earlier post about Fia's Destructive Tendencies, and you know that she is nearly the perfect dog... until you leave her alone. In an attempt to curb her destructive enthusiasm, we started crating her while we were at work. The first steel crate she had lasted 3 whole months before she bent the bars so much that she was able to climb out of the top of the crate and escape. Did I mention she was Houdini reincarnated? She has also figured out how to open every latch, clip, door, slide bar and hook in existence. Or she just eats them, you know, whatever is easier. Unfortunately I didn't take pictures of the first crate. The second crate looks like this --->

She had a hard time bending the bars, (she only weighs 20lbs), so she was forced to lick and drool on them until they rusted for easier breakage. This crate also lasted 6 months and had to be wired back together several times after Houdini escaped.

I always feel guilty locking her in such a small crate. Even though that is the size the vet recommends she has and says it's perfectly fine. To ease my guilt, hubby suggested we buy a gate for the downstairs "closet" and she could stay in there. The "closet" is the full length of the den and 6 and a half feet wide. I felt much better about this. I could envision her playing with her toys and having a gay ole' time while we were at work.

On day one, she figured out how to work the gate latch, which is pretty impressive considering it's 4 feet of the ground and she is less than 2 feet high. We then used a clip, like you would see on a dog leash, to secure the lock. She ate that on day 2. We then wired together the latch. She couldn't quite figure that one out so on day 3 she just ate a hole right through the chain link fence material on the gate. It isn't plastic either.

Hubby wired the hole closed in the brand new $75 gate and we tried again. Nothing happened for several days. It was then that we noticed dry wall dust on the carpet and took a look inside the crate. She had been scratching at the wall to try to open the door. Luckily our new wired latch seemed to be holding. About 2 weeks in she figured out that if she tried hard enough, she could jump over the 4 ft high gate, so hubby secured a piece of plywood over top to keep her in.

At this point I'm just frustrated. I love the dog dearly, but am terrified that she will eat the whole house when we're gone.

Last week I left work early because Fia had a vet appointment. I opened the front door and there she was, tail wagging, with a big, excuse the expression, shit-eating grin. I went down stairs to see the destruction and it turns out she had become frustrated with trying to escape through the gate and decided to eat her way through the wall. She had eaten through not one, but TWO layers of drywall. There was a little pile of drywall dogie puke sitting on the carpet, and her feet were covered in dust. Good thing we were going to the vet.

I was already running late and didn't have time to clean her up so we jumped into the truck and rushed over. The vet looked at her drywall caked feet, and looked at me as if to say, "what the hell have you been doing to this dog!" I carefully explained the entire story, including the reason for the crating. Halfway into the story he started to look sympathetic. By the time I was done he was shaking his head and his mouth was hanging open. "What should I do?" I asked. He looked at me, scratched his head, and said, "normally I would never suggest this, but have you thought about tranquilizers?"

Not excited about having a dog who was stoned all the time, I went home without the drugs. Hubby went to Home Depot and bought some plywood to cover all the walls inside the crate. She is continuing to eat holes in the gate and escaped again today. Hubby will go back to Home Depot and find something to cover the door.

It started out so nice. A pretty little gate, and a nice clean kennel. Now it looks like Dr Frankenstein bought a house and this is what happened.

Note how she somehow managed to eat the edge of the carpet, and bend the little Simpson's Fence sign from INSIDE the kennel. Suggestions, anyone?

She doesn't LOOK like Houdini, does she?

Welcome Back

I didn't make many resolutions this year, but this blog is definitely one of them. I hereby resolve to take at least one daily photo, and blog at least twice per week. I will do this for the entire year, come hell or highwater (<--- who came up with that expression anyway?).

Now that business is out of the way, I should tell you that this picture is of the stone in my front garden. Pretty huh? Thank god the people who owned this house before me knew how to garden.

Also part of the New Years tradition, is my goal to be healthier. After the last year of hell, this will not be a challenge. I worked way too much, and ate horribly as a result of it. When I wasn't working, I was in a zombie-like-coma until the alarm went off again. It was dreadful. However, my boss has promised me that things will be looking up for me in the new year, so here I am, making promises. Fingers crossed.

Not only am I making promises for myself, but also my furry four-legged fiend, Fia. It's -1 degree outside but we tortured ourselves by sneaking out for some fresh air anyway. See ---->

She had much more fun than I.

Happy New Year Everyone

Kitty Kat Woes

This is Samantha

She has started to use the entire house as a litter box. I am trying to get my house ready for sale... eau du kitty-kat does not smell very attractive to perspective buyers. What do I do? Hubby is pushing to give her up for adoption. It would break my heart. No one I know wants her. I want her, but I can't have little messes all over the house! I don't know what happened. She's never been like this before. I have no way to make her understand how important it is that she NOT pee on the carpet. If only she knew that peeing on the carpet would result in a trip to the humane society, where they will stuff her in a small cage in a room with strays and other sick animals for adoption. And if she doesn't get adopted within 3 weeks, a nice volunteer lady will take her into the back room where they will inject her with a lethal dose of something that stops her little heart. AHHHH. I can't take it. My eyes are watering just thinking about it. How cruel does that sound? I don't know what to do.

Adventures in Landlording Part II

Here's an update:

Mystery Substance on bedroom wall looks suspiciously like vomit, but cam off with much scrubbing.

Marker on carpet came off with some serious heavy duty steam cleaning.

Hockey Stickers are unfortunately still there.

Fridge and stove still need to be cleaned

Bathroom - bleach has brought the science experiment to an unfortunate end. However, now that the science experiment has been allowed to continue for so long, the bathroom walls, floor and ceiling are now rotted and need to be replaced. This will happen as soon as I win the lottery.

We've changed the locks and done some other minor repairs. My lovely neighbour has been cutting the grass for us. See? Chivalry is not dead!

I forgot to mention that the entire front and side porches smell strongly of cat urine. Yum. Does anyone know how to get rid of that? Apparently soap and water are not enough. I have lovely hedges that I would rather not cut down.. but I will if it gets rid of that god-awful stench!

Sigh. Back to work!

Adventures in Landlording

I think I've mentioned before that I've been renting my house out to a lovely couple for about a year now. Or, they were a lovely couple until the lady of the house decided to live elsewhere.... leaving the now-bachelor gentlemen to live by himself for 2 months. I'm guessing that was the last time the house was cleaned...

Yesterday I got the keys back! Very exciting. Hubby and I were hoping to paint and do some minor maintenance before the big move. Here are some of the interesting things we found:

-Full fridge, complete with leftover pizza and something I think used to be a sandwich. Oh. and the fridge was UNPLUGGED. Yummy.

-Colourful hockey stickers all over my trim in the living room. They are very sticky and will most likely need to be scraped off. Don't get me wrong, I'm a huge hockey fan, but I don't need a sticker from a cracker-jack box to remind me how much I love Wayne Gretzky.

-Said couple had a beautiful 4 year old son who apparently is quite an artist! What a shame they wouldn't get him some paper so he could take his creative scribbling with him instead of leaving it behind all over the carpet, the walls, and the baseboards in his bedroom. There is also a lovely display in the upstairs hallway so we can all be inspired every time we make a trip to the loo.

-They also left a complete science experiment in the bathroom, complete with colourful displays of mold and mildew on the shower curtain. I wasn't aware that it came in pink. How cool is THAT?

-They left their beautiful brass bargain-shop coat hangers screwed to my dining room wall. Now, I can conveniently hang my coats on the wall for decoration! How inventive. I'm sure it will add great ambiance during dinner parties.

-These people REALLY loved to watch cable. There is cable stapled to the walls running all over the house. Unfortunately, I may have to remove it as it doesn't match the beautiful, original oak baseboard that it's stapled to.

-I think the entire family was afraid of the dark as they removed all of the doors to the bedrooms... we did happen to find them in the upstairs closet. I suppose night lites weren't available where they were shopping, but now I have a complete open-concept bedroom style. I should send a photo to House & Home magazine... maybe I can start a trend!

-Mystery substance on the wall of the master bedroom. Ok. I can't even make a joke about this one. EW.

So, instead of painting, hubby and I will clean the house from top to bottom and steam clean the carpets, and repair damages (particularly a large hole that seems to have appeared upstairs). How exciting!

Catch up craziness!

I've been under the weather for a bit and am desperately trying to get everything back in order. I've missed reading all of your blogs, and am looking forward to catching up in the next couple of days.

On the Bermuda front... this looks like it's not going to happen. We have yet to hear back about our questions, which has me concerned. We haven't completely taken it off the stove, but it's definitely on the back burner. Hubby was contacted for an interview at a local insurance company though! Which would be ideal. He interviews next Tuesday. Fingers crossed!

I am desperately trying to think of ways to keep my step-son busy for the entire week of March break. We have purchased some model rockets, which hubby is very excited about, depending on the weather. He is very crafty, but I'm beginning to run out of projects. Anyone have any ideas?

Still haven't won the lottery... no surprise there. Keepin the dream alive though!

Hubby is very ill this week, but is stubbornly refusing to take care of himself, and refusing to let me do things for him. He is being very good about not complaining, but I know he has a fever and is feeling like someone ran over him with a tractor. So, to punish him for not letting me help, I bought him the worst-tasting cough medicine I could find and watched while he drank it. Then immediately felt bad when I saw the disgusted look on his face. It really is terrible, but seemed to work quite well. He happily takes a swig every 4-8hrs and does not blame me at all.

We are moving back to my old house on June 1st. I'm in the process of contacting movers ect. Here's a photo:

It a 110yr old monstrosity. I had moved out a while back and rented it to some lovely people, but now that money is tight again, we've decided to make the move back as it's closer to my work. I only lived in it for 8mths after I bought it, and it seems strange to be going back. These photo's are from when I first purchased it in 2006. It needs some cosmetic love, but you can't beat the price.