Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Flashing Hot at 29

Well. 28 and 11 months really. But who's counting.

I thought hot flashes were not supposed to start until menopause? It's October. It's freezing outside, and here I am dreaming of ice cream and for the love of GOD someone get me a cold cloth for the back of my neck!

We got our new company sweaters at work last week. Being a generally bad housekeeper, I haven't done my laundry, so today looked like a good day to try out the sweater. This is the part where I tell you it's a very pretty shade of blue, and made from Arctic Fleece. It fits just perfect, but is not so large that one could wear multiple layers underneath... so I of course, did not. Hold Please... the sweat is dripping in my eyes... there. That's better. Anyway, I'm wearing my new sweater, in a lovely shade of blue, at work today. I suppose it's a moderate sort of temperature. No one else seems to be swealtering, but I feel as though someone has wrapped me in a heating blanket and left me for dead. I imagine this is what a potatoe feels like when you wrap it in tin-foil and place it on the barbeque. Only without the pleasant cooking smell.

My co-worker suggested I take the sweater off, to which I blushed... or I would have blushed if I had not already been red-faced from extreme blood-pressure brought on by a spiking body temperature. While sitting in my office naked is a pleasant thought for my internal equilibrium, I'm sure there must be SOMETHING in the harrassment policy which forbids such a thing. The dress code for sure.

Currently I have my face pressed against the cool wood of my desk for a small measure of releif. It feels nice but is making typing difficult. I end up retyping the same sentences over and over as most come out looking like this ---> I ejd up typng het same sentnces ver andover as mos t come out lookkking like ths. It's very hard to type whilst your face is pressed against a desk. I wonder if there's a record for that. Perhaps I could become famous! But I digress.

It's five-oh-eight. Going home to burn the sweater and do something that makes me feel young.

Happy Wednesday.


Gaston Studio said...

You poor thing but don't do any of that hormone therapy stuff, it's bad for you!

Jinksy said...

Lots of sythetic fabrics make me feel like that - not hot, necessarily, but claustrophobic!

Carolina said...

And now we know why a sweater is called exactly thát!

I'm so glad you're back. Thanks for all your comments on my posts. You never fail to make me laugh. I'm glad I'm back too ;-)

Jewels said...

Gaston - I asked for a drug to get rid of the hormones completely, but apparently that means a hysterectomy, and possible brain surgery to remove my pituitary gland, so perhaps I'll just burn the sweater.

Jinksy - claustrophobic for sure! Who invented the turtle-neck anyway? (And Why is it called that?)

Caro - I'm glad you're back too. It's tooo quiet when you're away.

Madame DeFarge said...

Can't stand wearing wool next to my skin. Brings me out in a sweat rash. You have my deepest sympathy.

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