Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Out of my imagination

It started when I was 4. It was Easter. I have no idea why I remember that it was Easter, only that it was. That's when my re-occurring nightmare began. It always starts the same way. I'm walking down the stairs to the kitchen in my nightgown (presumably because it is morning). My mother is at the kitchen sink doing dishes. She hears me, and turns around, starting to smile. Then when her eyes fill with the vision of me standing at the bottom of the stairs - her look changes. It changes from her pleasant, good-morning-happy-to-see-you-face, and turns into her OH-MY-GOD-SOMETHING-IS-TERRIBLY-WRONG face. Not something a 4-year-old wants to see. The butterfly's are fluttering madly in my stomach now, and I timidly ask,
"What's wrong mummy?"
"OH MY GOD" she says, "you have OLD FASHION PURPLE NAILS!" Then she screams this long diva-like scream, which would make any cheesy horror flick proud.
I look down at my hands and they are sprouting these ridiculously long, purple fingernails which curl around themselves in a spiral like fashion. My heart feels as though it will burst in my chest.
I have no idea why this is so incredibly scary. It has some variations which are slightly less scary to live through. One version involves me trying to play the game Perfection with my terrifically terrifying talons. When I say it out loud it seems not so scary at all. Interestingly enough, the dream repeated itself a few times a month for years. If I was a shrink, I'd say I had mummy and daddy separation issues, but I'm not so I'm going to chalk it all up to an over-reactive imagination and too much sugar in my grape Kool-Aid.
If you google purple nails you will discover it is a symptom of blood clots or liver disease. Maybe I'm psychic and it was a prediction of things to come. Or maybe I just have an over-reactive imagination. What kind of 4-year-old dreams up OLD FASHIONED PURPLE NAILS anyway?


Carolina said...

Okay, so you definitely need therapy! Purple nails. Weird.
Still, slightly worrying. If I were you I'd be keeping a close eye on the colour of my nails. Just in case...

Jewels said...

I know right? I can't afford it though. So I talk to you instead! It's cheaper.

Carolina said...

:-) I'll mail the bill

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